If you’ve been perplexed to see these strange acronyms (ENTP, ISTP…) on many dating profiles, you’re not the only ones. They come from a personalities classification system called the Myers-Briggs schema.

Using the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) in dating can provide valuable insights into compatibility, communication styles, and potential relationship dynamics. While it’s important to remember that personality types aren’t definitive or all-encompassing, the MBTI can be a fun and helpful tool to understand how you and a potential partner might interact.

Here’s how you can use the MBTI for dating:

1. Learn Each Other’s Types

• Take the Test: First, both you and your partner (or potential partner) can take the Myers-Briggs test to determine your personality types. You can find free versions online if you don’t want to pay for the official test.
• Share Your Results: Once you have your results, share them with each other and discuss what the different traits mean. For example, if you’re an INFJ and they’re an ESTP, you may find your approaches to decision-making, socializing, and stress differ quite a bit, but this could be a great learning opportunity for both of you.

2. Understand Communication Styles

• Extraversion vs. Introversion (E/I): Extraverts might need more social interaction, while introverts may prefer quiet time alone. If you’re dating an introvert, respecting their need for solitude could help maintain harmony.
• Sensing vs. Intuition (S/N): Sensors tend to focus on the present and details, while intuitives think more about possibilities and the future. This can lead to differences in how you approach problems or conversations—sensors may prefer practical talk, while intuitives may dive into abstract or big-picture discussions.
• Thinking vs. Feeling (T/F): Thinkers value logic and objectivity, while feelers prioritize emotions and personal values. Understanding this difference can help prevent misunderstandings when discussing sensitive topics, like future plans or disagreements.
• Judging vs. Perceiving (J/P): Judgers prefer structure and planning, while perceivers are more spontaneous and flexible. If you’re a “J” dating a “P,” it’s good to be aware of each other’s approach to time management and decision-making.

3. Explore Compatibility

While no personality type is inherently “better” than another, some combinations may naturally complement each other. For example:

• Introverts (I) + Extraverts (E): Introverts can help extraverts slow down and appreciate quiet time, while extraverts can encourage introverts to step out of their comfort zones.
• Thinking (T) + Feeling (F): Thinkers and feelers may help balance each other’s tendencies to focus on logic or emotions. A thinker can help a feeler approach issues more objectively, while a feeler can encourage a thinker to be more empathetic and sensitive. That said, some combinations may lead to tension, such as:
• Judging (J) + Perceiving (P): A judger’s need for structure may clash with a perceiver’s desire for flexibility. This is a common pairing to require negotiation on how to handle plans and spontaneity.

4. Use It for Better Conflict Resolution

Understanding your partner’s MBTI type can give you insight into how they deal with conflict. For example:

• T types may prefer direct, fact-based discussions to resolve issues, while F types might focus more on how the conflict affects feelings and relationships.
• J types prefer to deal with issues quickly and reach closure, while P types might need more time and flexibility to process. By understanding these differences, you can tailor your approach to minimize unnecessary tension.

5. Adapt to Each Other’s Needs

• Respect Differences: Recognize that a difference in personality type doesn’t mean one person is “right” and the other is “wrong.” Instead, it’s an opportunity to understand how each person sees the world, processes information, and reacts to situations.
• Flexibility: For example, if you’re an INFJ (an idealist) and your partner is an ESTP (a pragmatist), you might find you have different approaches to life’s big decisions. An INFJ might dream of perfect scenarios, while an ESTP is focused on making things happen. Respecting each other’s style and finding compromise is key.

6. Use It to Discover Shared Interests

Certain personality types often enjoy similar activities. For example:

• ENFPs might enjoy spontaneous adventures and creative activities.
• ISTJs might prefer routine, organization, and practical hobbies. By understanding each other’s preferences and tendencies, you can plan dates and activities that cater to both your needs.

7. Consider Growth Opportunities

The MBTI can also highlight areas for growth in a relationship. For example:

• If one partner is very introverted and the other is highly extroverted, the introverted person might work on being more socially outgoing, while the extroverted person could learn to respect personal space.
• If one partner is a thinker (T) and the other is a feeler (F), they may need to focus on balancing logic and emotions when making important decisions.

8. Avoid Relying Too Much on It

While MBTI can offer insight into compatibility and personal dynamics, it should never be used as the sole factor for determining whether someone is a good match. Human beings are complex, and relationships involve more than personality types. Consider other factors like values, goals, and mutual respect when evaluating a potential partner.

Final Thoughts:

Using the Myers-Briggs personality test as a tool in dating can help you understand yourself and your partner better, communicate more effectively, and foster a deeper connection. However, it’s important to approach it with an open mind—people are multifaceted, and personality types are just one piece of the puzzle when it comes to building a successful relationship.